The other day I found some old receipts in my closet. I had to force myself to throw them away. I wanted to keep them because of the memories hidden in the faded ink.
The past is the past and holding onto it isn't helping me at all.
I really need another job.
Do you realize that I'm moving out to go to college in just over two months? That's so soon.
Why did tears just come to my eyes? Oh, right, I know why.
It's because the future is coming and I'm terrified. And apparently I cry when I'm scared.
I can't think straight.
My memories are becoming more distant and the present more dreamlike. I can't stop wondering how my life could be different.
I can't stop wondering how my life is going to turn out, and if people see me as abrasive and pushy. I can't stop questioning myself.
I don't know where I belong.
I'm carrying this sadness around in my chest and it's spreading. This ache in my heart that won't go away and I don't know how to make it.
I think I need a therapist.
I know I need answers, but I don't know how to find them.
I am completely lost.
This may be weird, but a therapist has totally helped me. I don't know what's going on in your life but I hope you are doing okay. I'm scared for the future too.
ReplyDelete